Kumvetsetsa Magawo A Chisoni Ndi Momwe Mungachitire Chisoni Pakutayika Kwanu

M'ndandanda wazopezekamo

Chidziwitso cha mkonzi: bukhuli silili buku la malangizo achisoni. Uku sikuti 'Kumva Chisoni Chifukwa cha Amayi Achimuna', kapena si njira yomwe muyenera kutsatira pang'onopang'ono.

Ngakhale ikufotokoza mitundu yosiyanasiyana yomwe imafotokoza magawo achisoni omwe munthu akhoza kukumana nawo, awa amaperekedwa kuti akuthandizeni kuzindikira zomwe mukumva ndikumvetsetsa kuti sizachilendo kumva motere.

Mutha kukhala ndi zina mwazomwe zalembedwa pansipa, kapena ayi. Palibe vuto lililonse.



Gwiritsani ntchito bukhuli ngati poyambira pomwe mungasanthule malingaliro anu, momwe mukumvera, komanso zokumana nazo zachisoni.



Gawo 1: Chiyambi Cha Chisoni

ndikufuna kumva kuti ndikufuna chibwenzi changa

Chisoni ndikumverera kwamphamvu, kawirikawiri kovuta, kwachilengedwe komwe anthu amakhala nako panthawi yotayika.

Zitha kubwera chifukwa cha imfa ya wokondedwa, kusintha kwakukulu pamoyo wamunthu, matenda akulu kapena osachiritsika azachipatala, kapena kutaya mwadzidzidzi kapena kwakukulu.



Munthuyo atha kudzimva kukhala wokhumudwa kwambiri kapena wamanjenje kwathunthu pamene akuyesera kuchita zinthu za tsiku ndi tsiku, koma sangathe chifukwa cha kulemera kwa zomwe akumva.

Chisoni chimakhala chapadera chifukwa chakuti chimakhudza kwambiri moyo wa munthu pomwe sichimachitika konsekonse. Aliyense amakumana nazo pamlingo winawake, ngakhale kukula kwake ndi kukula kwake kungasiyane kutengera zomwe zidapangitsa kumva chisoni komanso momwe akumvera.

Ndikofunikira kwambiri kuti musayese kukankhira malingaliro anu kapena okondedwa anu m'bokosi laling'ono kuti muyesetse kumvetsetsa. Anthu ndi momwe akumvera ndizovuta kwambiri, ndipo mudzachita bwino kusiyanitsa ndi kukwiyitsa iwo omwe akumva chisoni.

Kuwongolera uku ndikukupatsani chithunzithunzi cha mitundu yosiyanasiyana yachisoni, zokumana nazo ndi zizindikilo zomwe zimazungulira chisoni, mitundu ya omwe akumva chisoni, maupangiri ndi njira zina zothanirana ndi mavuto, komanso kupusitsa zabodza zabodza zokhudza chisoni.

Tiyeni tiyambe ndi mitundu yosiyanasiyana yachisoni yomwe munthu angakumane nayo.

1.1: Mitundu Yosiyanasiyana Ya Chisoni

Chisoni chitha kuwonetsedwa m'njira zosiyanasiyana kutengera munthuyo. Zitha kukhudza munthu mwakuthupi, mwamakhalidwe, mwamakhalidwe, kapena mwanzeru posintha machitidwe ndi kuthekera kwake kugwira ntchito.

Chisoni chachilendo - Chisoni chabwinobwino sichiyenera kuonedwa ngati chaching'ono m'njira iliyonse. Kungokhala dzina losankhidwa kuti lisonyeze mtundu wachisoni chomwe munthu angayembekezere kuti munthu adzadutsamo akakumana ndi kutayika.

Munthu yemwe akumva chisoni nthawi zonse amakhala akusintha momwe akumvera ndikupita kukalandira kutayika, ndikuwonjezeka mwamphamvu, kwinaku akukhalabe ndi moyo.

Palibe chisoni choyenera kuonedwa ngati chosafunikira kapena chocheperapo kuposa china. Zowawa zotayika ndizowona komanso zofunikira.

Chisoni choyembekezera - Munthu amatha kukhala ndi chisoni choyembekezereka akakumana ndi vuto lofooketsa kwa iye kapena wokondedwa.

Kusokonezeka ndi kudziimba mlandu nthawi zambiri kumatsagana ndi chisoni choyembekezeredwa chifukwa munthuyo akadali ndi moyo.

Ndi mtundu wachisoni chifukwa chamapulani omwe adayikidwapo kale kapena kuyembekezeredwa komanso zomwe zimakhudza kutayika kwa njira yayitali komanso thanzi la munthu.

Uwu ndiye mtundu wachisoni womwe umalumikizidwa ndi zinthu monga matenda osachiritsika.

Chisoni chovuta - Chisoni chophatikizika chimadziwikanso kuti kukhumudwa koopsa kapena kwakanthawi.

Munthu atha kukhala ndichisoni chovuta ngati ali ndi nthawi yayitali yachisoni yomwe imalepheretsa kuchita bwino moyo wawo.

Amatha kuwonetsa zomwe zimawoneka ngati zosagwirizana ndi malingaliro, monga kudziimba mlandu kwambiri, kudziwononga, kudzipha kapena malingaliro achiwawa, kusintha kwakanthawi kamoyo, kapena kugwiritsa ntchito mankhwala osokoneza bongo.

Izi zitha kuchitika chifukwa cha munthu yemwe akumapewa chisoni chawo komanso osadzilola kuti amve momwe akumvera kuti ayenera kumva kuti achire.

Chisoni chodziwitsidwa - Chisoni chosasunthika ndichachidziwikire ndipo chimafanana ndi kutaya wina kapena china chomwe anthu samakonda kuyanjana nacho nthawi zonse, monga bwenzi wamba, wogwira naye ntchito, wokwatirana naye, kapena ziweto.

Zitha kuphatikizanso mtundu wa kuchepa komwe kumayambitsidwa ndi matenda osatha mwa wokondedwa, monga ziwalo kapena matenda amisala.

Chisoni chamtunduwu chimachokera kwa anthu ena osayika kufunika kwa chisoni cha munthu, kuwauza kuti sizoyipa kapena ayenera kungoyamwa ndikuchita nawo.

Chisoni chosatha - Munthu amene ali ndi chisoni chosatha amatha kuwonetsa zizindikilo zomwe zimakhudzana ndi kukhumudwa kwakukulu, monga kudzimva kukhala wopanda chiyembekezo, kufooka, komanso kukhumudwa.

Wodwalayo atha kupewa zinthu zomwe zimawakumbutsa za kutayika kwawo, osakhulupirira kuti kutayika kwachitika, kapena angakhale ndi maziko azikhulupiriro zawo omwe amakayikiridwa chifukwa chakutayika.

Chisoni chosatha chimatha kukhala kugwiritsa ntchito mankhwala osokoneza bongo, kudzivulaza, malingaliro ofuna kudzipha, komanso kukhumudwa kwamankhwala ngati sichingasinthidwe.

Chisoni chowonjezera - Chisoni chochulukirapo chitha kuchitika ngati munthu wagwidwa ndi zovuta zingapo munthawi yochepa pomwe alibe nthawi yoyenera kumva chisoni chilichonse.

Chisoni chobisika - Chisoni chitha kuwonetsedwa m'njira zosamveka bwino, monga zizindikiritso zakuthupi kapena machitidwe ena. Izi zimadziwika ngati chisoni chobisika. Wodandaula nthawi zambiri samadziwa kuti kusintha kumeneku kumakhudzana ndi chisoni chawo.

Chisoni cholakwika - Wodandaula akhoza kukhala wolakwa kwambiri kapena mkwiyo wokhudzana ndi kutayika komwe kumabweretsa kusintha kwamakhalidwe, chidani, kudziwononga komanso machitidwe owopsa , kugwiritsa ntchito mankhwala osokoneza bongo, kapena kudzivulaza.

Chokokomeza chisoni - Chisoni chamtunduwu chimakulitsa zomwe zimawoneka ngati mayankho abwinobwino achisoni. Ikhoza kukula kwambiri pakapita nthawi.

Munthuyo amatha kudziwonetsera yekha, kufuna kudzipha, machitidwe ena owopsa, kugwiritsa ntchito mankhwala osokoneza bongo, maloto owopsa, komanso mantha owonjezera. Chisoni chokulirachi chingayambitsenso matenda amisala obisika.

Chisoni choletsa - Anthu ambiri samakhala omasuka kuwonetsa chisoni chawo, chifukwa chake amangokhala chete.

Izi, pazokha, sizoyipa kwenikweni bola ngati akutenga nthawi kuti akhale achisoni m'njira yawoyawo.

Icho chimakhala chinthu choipa pamene munthuyo samalola kuti alire konse, zomwe zingapangitse chisoni chawo kukhala chowopsya kwambiri ndi chovuta kupirira pamene nthawi ikupita.

Chisoni chonse - Chisoni chonse ndi cha gulu, monga pakagwa tsoka m'dera kapena anthu ena amwalira.

Chidule chachisoni - Munthu amene wataya chinthu atha kupeza kena kake kamene kamadzaza mpata womwe udasiyidwa ndi zomwezo, ndikuwapangitsa kumva chisoni mwachidule.

Izi zitha kuchitika munthuyo atawona kuchepa kwa wokondedwa, kudziwa kutha kukubwera, komanso kumva chisoni. Chisoni chomwe adzakhale nacho wokondedwa wawo atamwalira ndichisoni chidule.

Chisoni chopanda - Chisoni chomwe chimakhalapo chimachitika ngati wina savomereza kuti watayika ndipo sakusonyeza chisonicho. Izi zitha kuchitika chifukwa chadzidzidzi kapena kukana kwakukulu.

Kutayika kwachiwiri - Kutayika kwachiwiri kumatha kubweretsa chisoni mwa wopulumukayo. Kutayika kwachiwiri ndi zinthu zomwe zimatayika mwachindunji chifukwa cha tsoka.

Imfa ya mnzawo ingatanthauze kutayika kwa ndalama, kutayika kwa nyumba, kutayika kwa umwini, ndi kutayika pazinthu zilizonse zomwe banjali linali nazo mtsogolo. Zowonjezera izi nthawi zambiri zimafunikanso kulira.

Gawo 2: Zitsanzo Zachisoni

Kwa zaka zambiri, chisoni chaphunziridwa ndi anthu ambiri omwe akuyesera kuti amvetsetse zomwe zidachitikazo.

Maphunzirowa apatsa dziko lapansi mitundu yosiyanasiyana yachisoni yomwe imayesetsa kukhala chitsogozo chazomwe zimakhudzidwa ndi momwe zimakhalira.

Mitundu yonse yachisoni ili ndi vuto lomwelo - kuti ndizosatheka kufotokozera pang'ono zomwe zimachitikira munthu kudzera m'magulu azachipatala ndi mawu.

Aliyense amakumana ndi chisoni mosiyanasiyana. Aliyense ali ndi malingaliro osiyanasiyana pazomwe akumva kuti chisoni chili kapena sichili. Anthu ena amawona zokumana nazo zoyipa molimbika pang'ono kuposa ena.

Chifukwa chake, mitunduyo imatha kungoyang'aniridwa ngati malamulo onse a thupi ndipo palibenso china.

momwe mungakhalire ochepera komanso osowa chibwenzi

Bukuli lifotokoza mwachidule mitundu isanu ndi umodzi yachisoni, yonse yomwe ili ndi zoyipa ndi zolakwika zawo. Kumbukirani: palibe mtundu wotsimikizika womwe ungagwire ntchito kwa munthu aliyense kapena mkhalidwe uliwonse.

Ndipo, kafukufuku wowonjezera komanso kupita patsogolo kwamaphunziro okhudzana ndi chisoni komanso kuferedwa kumatsimikizira kuti anthu ambiri samva chisoni m'njira yomwe imakhudzanso kuthekera kwawo kuchita moyo wawo, chifukwa chake palibe mtundu womwe ungawakwaniritse chifukwa samadutsa magawo aliwonse chogwirika njira.

2.1: Magawo Asanu Achisoni Olembedwa ndi Dr. Elisabeth Kübler-Ross ndi David Kessler

Mtundu wa Kübler-Ross pachiyambi sunagwiritse ntchito chisoni cha kutayika. Dr. Kübler-Ross adapanga chithunzichi kuti chimveke bwino momwe munthu angavomereze kuti akumwalira, popeza ntchito yake yambiri imakhudza omwe ali ndi matenda osachiritsika, ndipo adafotokozedwa motere m'buku lake la 1969, Pa Imfa ndi Kufa .

Sizinapitirire nthawi yaitali kuti avomereze kuti chitsanzo chake chingagwiritsenso ntchito momwe anthu amachitira ndi chisoni ndi zovuta.

Mtunduwo udayamba kutengeka kwambiri ndipo pamapeto pake udakhala gawo lamaphunziro a psychology.

Mtundu wa Kübler-Ross ukuwonetsa kuti munthu amene akumva chisoni adzadutsa magawo asanu, popanda dongosolo lililonse - kukana, kukwiya, kukambirana, kukhumudwa, kuvomereza.

Kukana

Kukana kumawerengedwa kuti ndi gawo loyamba mwa magawo asanu achisoni. Zitha kutenga mawonekedwe osadabwitsa komanso osavomerezeka chifukwa cha zovuta zilizonse zomwe tikukumana nazo. Munthuyo amatha kumva dzanzi, ngati kuti sangapitirire, kapena sakufuna kupitiliza.

Amaganiziridwa kuti kukana kumathandizira kufafaniza kuwukira koyambirira kokhudzana ndi kutayika, kuti malingaliro athe kuvomereza kutayika ndikugwira ntchito pamalingaliro omwe akukhudzana nawo momwemo.

Mkwiyo

Mkwiyo umapereka nangula wofunikira komanso kapangidwe kake munthawi yovuta.

Zomwe zimachitika poyambira zimatha kusiya munthu wopanda cholinga komanso wopanda maziko. Munthu wachisoni atha kupsa mtima molunjika m'njira zosiyanasiyana, ndipo zili bwino.

Nthawi zambiri zimangokhala gawo limodzi lazomwe zimachitika ndikutaya mosayembekezereka. Ndikofunika kudzilola kutero kumva mkwiyo wawo , chifukwa pamapeto pake ipita kumalo ena osinthika.

Kukambirana

Munthu atha kudzipeza kuti akunyengerera kuti ayesetse kupanga tanthauzo ndi kutayika kwawo, kuti ayesetse kusunga moyo wawo monga momwe amadziwira kale.

Izi zitha kubwera ngati kuyesa kukambirana ndi mphamvu yayikulu ngati wina ali ndi zokonda zauzimu (“Mulungu, chonde siyani mwana wanga ndipo ndidzatero…”) kapena ndi inemwini (“Ndichita zonse kuti ndikhale mkazi wabwino ngati wokwatirana naye angodutsa izi. ”)

Kukambirana ndi yankho lachilengedwe kwa munthu amene akuyesetsa kuti agwirizane ndi a kusintha m'moyo wawo .

Matenda okhumudwa

Chisoni chachikulu monga kupsinjika mtima kungamveke chifukwa cha kutayika. Zachisoni izi sizitanthauza kuti ali ndi matenda amisala, koma ndi yankho lina lachilengedwe kutayika kwakukulu.

Munthuyo akhoza kuchoka, kumverera ndekha komanso kusungulumwa , ndikudabwa ngati palibe chifukwa chopitilira.

Kukhumudwa kwamtunduwu sichinthu chomwe chingayendetsedwe kapena kukonzedwa, ngakhale yankho likhoza kukhala kuyesa kulikonza.

Kudzilola kuti amve chisoni chawo, kukhumudwa kwakukulu, kudzawalola kuti apitilize ulendo wawo wolandila.

Kulandila

Kulandila nthawi zambiri kumasokonezedwa ndikumverera bwino ndikutaya. Anthu ambiri samva bwino akamatayika kwambiri.

Kulandila ndikuti timaphunzira kugwira ntchito ndikupita mtsogolo, ngakhale tili ndi dzenje lotsalira m'moyo wathu.

Zimatilola ife kutenga zidutswa zomwe zatsala ndikupita nazo patsogolo mtsogolo, ndikupita mpaka pomwe timayamba kukhala ndi zabwino kuposa masiku oyipa kachiwiri.

Sizitanthauza kuti tibwezeretse zomwe tidataya, koma kuti tuloleza kuti tipeze kulumikizana kwatsopano ndikupitilizabe kukhala ndi moyo.

Chifukwa cha kukumbatirana kwakukulu kwa mtundu wa Kübler-Ross, ena atulutsa mitundu yofananira yomwe imasintha ntchito yoyambirira ya Dr. Kübler-Ross. Chodziwika kwambiri mwa izi ndi Magawo Asanu ndi Awiri Achisoni, momwe munthu wosadziwika adawonjezerapo njira zingapo (zomwe zimasiyanasiyana kutengera komwe mumanena).

Sizikuwoneka kuti mtundu wosinthawu udachokera kwa munthu kapena bungwe lililonse lovomerezeka.

2.2: Ntchito Zinayi Zachisoni za Dr. J. William Worden

Zolepheretsa mtundu wa Kübler-Ross ndikuti zimafotokozera zomwe munthu amene akumva chisoni akumakumana nazo, koma osalankhula momwe munthuyo angathetsere ululu ndikupitiliza ulendo wawo wamachiritso.

Dr. J. William Worden adanenanso kuti pali Ntchito Zinayi Zolira zomwe munthu ayenera kumaliza kuti afike pabwino ndi chisoni chawo.

Ntchito zinayi sizolumikizana, osati zogwirizana ndi nthawi iliyonse, ndipo ndizogonjera kutengera momwe zinthu ziliri. Ntchitoyi imagwiranso ntchito imfa ya wokondedwa.

Ntchito Yoyamba - Landirani zenizeni za kutayika.

A Worden amakhulupirira kuti kuvomereza chenicheni cha kutayika ndiye maziko a machiritso onse amtsogolo.

Munthu amene akuvutika kuti avomereze kutayika atha kutenga nawo mbali pazinthu zomwe zimatsimikizira kuti kutayika kudachitikadi.

Mwachitsanzo, ngati wokondedwa wamwalira, kuwona thupi kapena kuthandiza kukonza malirowo kungamuthandize munthuyo kuvomereza kuti watayika.

Ntchito Yachiwiri - Chitani chisoni ndi ululu wanu.

Pali njira zopanda malire zomwe munthu angathetsere chisoni chake ndi kupweteka kwake.

Palibe yankho lolakwika kwenikweni bola ngati zochita za munthuyo zimawathandiza kukonza, ndipo sagwiritsidwa ntchito ngati kuthawa zenizeni zawo.

Anthu ena amafunika kungochita kambiranani , ena amafunikira chithandizo chofunikira kwambiri, ena atha kugwiritsa ntchito zochita ndi zochitika zina kuti athe kuwongolera ndikulimbana - monga ntchito yongodzipereka ndi gulu lomwe likukhudzana ndi zoopsa zawo.

Ntchito Yachitatu - Sinthani dziko popanda wokondedwa momwemo.

Imfa ya wokondedwa idzabweretsa kusintha kwa moyo wa munthu. Kulandira kusintha kumeneku ndi kupita patsogolo kungathandize wodwalayo kuti avomereze kutayikidwako.

Izi zitha kutanthauza kuchita zinthu monga kusintha moyo, kubwerera kuntchito, ndikupanga mapulani atsopano mtsogolo popanda wokondedwa wawo.

Kusapezeka kwa womwalirayo kumatha kukhudza munthu m'njira zambiri, mosayembekezereka. Atangoyamba kusintha kumene, kumakhala kosavuta kwa iwo kuyamba njira yawo yatsopano.

Ntchito Yachinayi - Kupeza njira yolumikizira munthu amene wamwalira uku mukuyamba moyo wanu.

Gawo lachinayi limakhudza wopulumukayo kupeza njira yosungilira kulumikizana ndi wokondedwa wawo yemwe wamwalira, pomwe amatha kupita patsogolo ndikukhala ndi moyo wawo.

Sikutanthauza kuiwala kapena kusiya wokondedwa wakufayo, osangokhala nazo ululu kutsogolo ndi pakati, kuwongolera moyo wa wopulumuka ndi moyo wabwino.

A Worden adanenetsa kwambiri kuti palibe nthawi yoyenera kuti wina agwire ntchito zinayi izi. Anthu ena amatha kuwayenda mwachangu, ena amatha miyezi kapena zaka kuti adutsemo.

Anthu amatayika m'njira zosiyanasiyana komanso mwamphamvu, chifukwa chake njira yabwino ndiyakuti khazikani mtima pansi pamene wopulumukayo akuyenda m'njira yawo.

2.3: Magawo Anai Achisoni Olembedwa ndi Dr. John Bowlby ndi Dr. Colin Murray Parkes

Potengera Kübler-Ross masiteji asanu, mtundu wa Bowlby ndi Parkes udawuziridwa ndikuchokera ku ntchito ya upainiya ya Bowlby pakuphatikiza chiphunzitso ndi ana.

onetsetsani kuti simupuma mwaulere

Chidwi cha Dr. Bowlby chinali paubwana wachichepere komanso mikhalidwe yamabanja yomwe idapanga kukula kwabwino komanso koyipa mwa ana.

Pambuyo pake adatenga ntchito yake pazolumikizira ndikuigwiritsa ntchito pachisoni ndi chisoni, kuwonetsa kuti chisoni chinali chifukwa chachilengedwe cha kusweka kwa chikondi.

Bowlby amathandizira kwambiri nthanthiyi komanso magawo atatu, pomwe Parkes amatha kukonza zina zonse.

Gawo Loyamba - Kusokonezeka ndi kufooka.

Mchigawo chino, akumva chisoni akuwona kuti kutayikidwako sikowona, kuti kutayika ndikosatheka kuvomereza. Munthuyo amatha kukhala ndi zizindikilo zakuthupi zomwe mwina sizingagwirizane ndi chisoni chawo.

Munthu wachisoni yemwe sagwira gawo lino amakumana ndi zipsinjo zonga kupsinjika komwe kumamulepheretsa kupitilira magawo.

Gawo Lachiwiri - Kulakalaka ndikusaka.

Iyi ndiye gawo yomwe achisoni amadziwa zakumwalira kwa wokondedwa wawo ndipo akufuna njira zodzakwanitsira chosowacho. Atha kuyamba kuzindikira kuti tsogolo lawo liziwoneka mosiyana kwambiri.

Munthuyo akuyenera kupitilira gawo lino kuti alolere mwayi wokhala ndi tsogolo latsopano ndi losiyana kukula popanda kuwawidwa komwe kulamulire kukhalapo kwawo.

Gawo Lachitatu - Kukhumudwa ndi kusokonezeka.

Gawo lachitatu, achisoni avomereza kuti moyo wawo wasintha, kuti tsogolo lomwe amalingalira silidzakhalakonso.

Munthuyo atha kukhala wokwiya, wopanda chiyembekezo, wokhumudwa, wodandaula, komanso wofunsidwa mafunso pozindikira izi.

Moyo ungamve ngati sungasinthe, kukhala wabwino, kapena wopindulitsa popanda wokondedwa wawo wakufa. Zomverera izi zitha kupitilirabe ngati sangapeze njira yoyendetsera gawoli.

Gawo Lachinayi - Kukonzanso ndi kuchira.

Chikhulupiriro m'moyo ndi chisangalalo zimayamba kubwerera m'gawo lachinayi. Chisoni chikhoza kukhazikitsa njira zatsopano m'moyo, maubale atsopano, kulumikizana kwatsopano, ndikuyamba kumanganso.

Amatha kuzindikira kuti moyo ungakhalebe wabwino komanso wabwino, ngakhale atataya nawo moyo.

Kulemera kwake kumacheperako ndipo ngakhale kuwawa sikumatha konse, kumasiya kulamulira malingaliro ndi malingaliro amunthuyo.

Akatswiri ambiri achisoni, kuphatikiza Dr. Kübler-Ross, adakhudzidwa kwambiri ndi nkhani ya Bowlby ya 1961, Njira zolira maliro , yomwe inatuluka mu International Journal of Psychoanalysis.

2.4: Njira Zisanu ndi chimodzi za Rando Zobwezeretsa ndi Dr. Therese Rando

Kuti mumvetsetse njira zisanu ndi chimodzi za Kubwezeretsa kwa Dr. Rando, munthu ayenera kudziwa bwino kusiyanasiyana kwamatchulidwe, magawo ake atatu akulira, ndi njira zisanu ndi imodzi kuti agwiritse ntchito magawo amenewo.

Dr. Rando amasiyanitsa chisoni ndi kulira. Chisoni ndi momwe munthu amadzimvera chisoni akakumana ndi zotayika. Kulira ndi njira yokhazikika, yogwira ntchito yothana ndi chisoni cha munthu mpaka kuvomereza ndi kukhala.

Iye anakhulupirira izo kupewa, mikangano, ndi malo okhala ndiwo magawo atatu akulira omwe munthu ayenera kulumikizana nawo.

Njira Zisanu ndi chimodzi za Rando Zachisoni zimagwera magawo atatuwo ndikulola wolirayo kuti akafike komwe akupita ulendo wawo wamachiritso, ndiye kuti, nthawi yomwe chisoni cha munthuyo sichingakhale chopweteketsa ndipo amatha kukhala ndi moyo wopindulitsa, watanthauzo.

Njira 1 - Kuzindikira kutayika (Kupewa)

Olira maliro ayenera kuzindikira koyamba ndikumvetsetsa imfa ya wokondedwa wawo.

Njira 2 - Kuyankha kupatukana (Kulimbana)

Wachisoni ayenera kudziwa momwe zimakhudzira kutayika, kuphatikiza kuzindikira, kumva, kuvomereza, ndi kufotokoza malingaliro amenewo m'njira yomveka kwa achisoni. Izi zimaphatikizaponso kuchitapo kanthu pazotayika zilizonse zokhudzana ndi kutayika koyambirira.

Njira 3 - Kumbukiraninso ndikudziwitsanso (Kulimbana)

Izi zimathandizira omvera kuti athe kuwunikiranso osati kukumbukira womwalirayo, koma kuthana ndi vuto lililonse lomwe likadakhala pakati pawo asanamwalire.

Njira 4 - Kutaya zolumikizira zakale (Kulimbana)

Omwe akumva chisoni adzafunika kusiya zomwe anali atalumikizana ndi moyo womwe adakonzekera ndi womwalirayo. Izi sizitanthauza kuti amaiwala kapena kusiya womwalirayo, kungoti amangosiya zomwe zilipo komanso tsogolo lomwe anali akuganiza ndi munthuyo.

Njira 5 - Kusintha (Pogona)

Njira yosinthira imathandizira olira kuyamba kupita patsogolo m'moyo wawo watsopano, kuphatikiza wakale ndikupanga ubale wina ndi womwalirayo, kuwalola kuti atenge mbali zatsopano zadziko ndikupeza mawonekedwe awo atsopano.

Njira 6 - Kubwezeretsanso (Pogona)

Njira yobwezeretsanso ndikumva chisoni ndikulowa m'moyo wawo watsopano, kuyika ubale watsopano ndi zolinga.

A Dr. Rando amakhulupirira kuti kumaliza njira zisanu ndi chimodzi izi pakapita miyezi kapena zaka kungathandize omvera kupita patsogolo m'moyo wawo.

Amakhulupirira makamaka kuti ndikofunikira kuti achisoni amvetsetse chomwe chidapangitsa kutayika kuti athe kuvomereza. Izi zitha kukhala zovuta kwambiri ndi imfa zomwe sizingakhale zomveka, monga bongo kapena kudzipha .

2.5: Dual Process Model Model of chisoni ndi Margaret Stoebe ndi Henk Schut

bret the hitman hart imfa

Dual Process Model Model of chisoni sichopeza njira yothanirana ndi chisoni, komanso zambiri zakumvetsetsa momwe munthu amakumana ndi zomwe zimachitika pachisoni chokhudzana ndi imfa ya wokondedwa.

Chitsanzocho chimanena kuti munthu wachisoni amayenda pakati pamavuto okhudzana ndi kutayika ndi mayankho obwezeretsa momwe akugwirira ntchito pochira.

Mayankho okhudzana ndi kutayika ndi zomwe anthu amaganiza akaganiza zachisoni. Zitha kukhala zachisoni, kulira, kusowa kanthu, kuganiza za wokondedwa wake, komanso kufunitsitsa kuchoka kudziko lapansi.

Mayankho obwezeretsa Phatikizani kuyamba kudzaza mipata yomwe womwalirayo adasiya. Izi zingaphatikizepo zinthu monga kuphunzira kugwiritsa ntchito bwino ndalama, kugwira ntchito zofunika kwambiri ndi maudindo omwe wokondedwayo adachita muubwenzi, kupanga maubale atsopano, ndikumakumana ndi zinthu zatsopano.

Chofunikira pa mtunduwu ndikuti imakhazikitsa ziyembekezo zina pakuloleza wodwalayo kuyendetsa njirayi.

Inde, padzakhala mayankho ozama, okonda kutaya komwe angavutike kuti azigwira ntchito pamoyo wawo watsiku ndi tsiku.

Komabe, atha kupeza chilimbikitso podziwa kuti ndi gawo limodzi la ntchitoyi, kuti ndi njira yozungulira, ndipo pamapeto pake adzabwerera kumayankho okhudzana ndi kubwezeretsa.

Munthu wachisoni nthawi zambiri amatsata mkombero uku ndi uku momwe akumvera chisoni mpaka kukafika pamalo ochiritsidwa.

2.6: Chitsanzo cha Kutayika / Kutengera kwa Mardi Horowitz, MD

Model of Loss / Adaptation yolembedwa ndi Mardi Horowitz, MD idapangidwa kuti ifotokozere bwino momwe akumvera, mawonekedwe, ndi momwe magawo am'magawo osiyanasiyana achisoni.

Ngakhale imakumana ndi zosiyana mosiyanasiyana ndi anthu, mtunduwu ukhoza kuthandizira kukhala chitsogozo chonse cha zomwe munthu wofedwa angamve.

Kulira

Kumwalira kwa wokondedwa kungayambitse kulira kochokera kwa womwalirayo. Kufuula kungakhale kwakunja kapena mkati.

Kulira kwakunja nthawi zambiri kumakhala mawu osalamulirika monga kufuula, kukomoka, kapena kulira.

Anthu atha kukhala akumva kutengeka komwe kumagwirizana ndi kulira kwakunja, koma zimawalepheretsa kuti asawakhumudwitse. Kukula kwa malingaliro oyamba ndi kwakanthawi ndipo sikukhalitsa.

Kukana ndi Kulowerera

Pambuyo pakulira, munthu nthawi zambiri amasuntha pakati pa kukana ndikulowerera.

Potengera mtunduwu, kukana kumaphatikizapo zochitika zomwe zimalola kuti munthuyo asayang'ane zomwe adakumana nazo. Izi zikhoza kukhala zinthu monga kudziponyera okha kuntchito yawo kapena kutenga udindo waukulu kotero kuti alibe nthawi yoganizira za kutayika kwawo.

Gawo lolowererapo ndi pamene munthuyo akumva malingaliro okhudzana ndi kutayika mwamphamvu kwambiri kotero kuti sangathe kuzinyalanyaza. Wachisoni atha kumva liwongo pamene sakumva kukula kwa kutayika, koma ndizabwino ndipo ndi gawo limodzi lazochitikazo.

Kuzungulira pakati pa kukana ndikulowerera kumapereka malingaliro amunthuyo kupumula ndikukhazikitsanso momwe zimayendera ululu.

Kugwira Ntchito

Nthawi ikamadutsa, nthawi yayitali yanjinga pakati pa kukana ndikulowerera.

Munthuyo amakhala ndi nthawi yocheperako akuganiza zakotayika, zomwe zimakhudzana ndi kutayika zimayamba kutsika ndikuchepa, ndipo zimachepa kwambiri.

Munthuyu azingoganiza ndikusintha momwe akumvera mozungulira kutayika kwawo, ndikuyamba kuyesetsa kupeza njira zatsopano zopitilira ndikukhala moyo wopanda wokondedwa wawo.

Amatha kuyamba kudzipanganso m'moyo, monga kufunafuna mabwenzi atsopano ndi maubale, kuchita zosangalatsa zatsopano, kapena kufunafuna zinthu zina zokhutiritsa zomwe angachite.

Kumaliza

Zitha kutenga miyezi kapena zaka, koma pamapeto pake munthuyo adzafika kumapeto, mwakuti tsopano atha kugwira ntchito ndi kutayika kwake.

Izi sizitanthauza kuti atha chifukwa cha kutayika kapena kusiya kwathunthu, zimangotanthauza kuti munthuyo tsopano atha kugwira ntchito ndikuchita moyo wawo popanda kutayika komwe kumalamulira momwe akumvera.

Munthuyo atha kukhala ndichisoni chokhudzana ndi mbali zofunikira zaubwenzi, monga zikondwerero, masiku okumbukira kubadwa, malo opumulirako tchuthi, kapena malo odyera omwe amakonda. Chisoni chomwe amakhala nacho kumapeto kwake nthawi zambiri chimakhala chochepa komanso chosakhalitsa.

Mwinanso mungakonde (nkhani ikupitirira pansipa):

Gawo 3: Malangizo Odzisamalirira Pakumva Chisoni

Ndikosavuta kulowa munthawi yakukhumudwa komanso kunyinyirika ukakhala ndi chisoni.

Wina ayenera kuyesetsa kukhala ndi zizolowezi zabwino komanso zabwino momwe angathere, ngakhale malingaliro awo atha kuyenda kudutsa malo ovuta. Pochita izi, munthuyo amatha kuchepetsa zovuta zakunja kwinaku akumva chisoni ndi kutayika kwawo.

1. Khalani okoma mtima ndi odekha nanu.

Maziko achire ndikulimbana ndi kuleza mtima. Njira yachisoni siyikhala yothamanga.

Kutengera ndikulira kwachisoni, zingatenge zaka kuti ululuwo ubwerere mpaka pomwe sumalamulira moyo kapena malingaliro a munthu. Chisoni ndi njira yomwe imatenga nthawi.

2. Sungani njira zodziyang'anira pawokha moyenera.

Pewani kugwa m'mikhalidwe yolimbana ndi malingaliro. Ndikosavuta kutengera kudya kwam'maganizo, kugona tulo mopitilira muyeso, kapena kulowa m'zizolowezi zosokoneza bongo ngati njira yothana ndi mavuto.

Dziwani za misampha imeneyi ndikuyesetsa kukhala ndi moyo wathanzi mwa kudya zakudya zabwino, kumwa madzi ambiri, komanso kutsatira nthawi yogona.

Kuyesedwa pafupipafupi ndi dokotala ndi lingaliro labwino, chifukwa kupsinjika kumatha kufooketsa chitetezo cha mthupi chomwe chingakusiyeni kuti mutengeke ndi matenda.

3. Yambirani kapena pitirizani kuchita masewera olimbitsa thupi.

Kuchita masewera olimbitsa thupi pafupipafupi kumapereka zabwino zambiri pakungopangitsa kuti munthu akhale wathanzi, komanso zimathandizira kuchepetsa kukhumudwa kapena kukhumudwa .

Ngakhale kuyenda pang'ono pa sabata kumatha kusintha kwambiri thanzi lathu komanso thanzi. Onetsetsani kuti mwaonana ndi dokotala musanayambe kapena kusintha kwambiri zochitika zolimbitsa thupi.

4. Lumikizanani ndi anthu ena.

Community ndi chida champhamvu chomwe chimalola anthu ochokera kumitundu yosiyanasiyana omwe akukumana ndi zokumana nazo zofananira kuti alumikizane.

Mutha kuphunzira njira zothanirana ndi malingaliro ochokera kwa anthu ena omwe adayenda m'njira zomwezi popereka ndi kulandira chithandizo kuchokera kwa anthu omwe amamvetsetsa.

Magulu othandizira am'deralo kapena othandizira amatha kukhala zida zothandiza pochiritsa.

Gawo 4: Zikhulupiriro Zabodza Zokhudza Chisoni

Nthano - Chisoni cha munthu chimatha kulowa muchitsanzo chodziwikiratu.

Chowonadi ndichakuti chisoni ndichokumana nacho kwakwathu komwe kudzasiyana anthu ndi munthu. Anthu ena adzakumana ndi chisoni chachikulu, pomwe ena sadzakumana nacho.

Mitundu yomwe ili mu bukhuli imagwira ntchito ngati malangizo azomwe mungayembekezere. Akatswiri azaumoyo omwe amagwiritsa ntchito mitundu yamtunduwu amaphunzitsidwa ndikuphunzitsidwa kuti amvetsetse kuti palibe njira yosavuta, yayikulu imodzi yomwe ingakwaniritse mayankho onse pakufufuza momwe munthu alili.

Nthano - Kuchira mwachangu pachisoni kumatanthauza kusiya kutayika kapena wokondedwa pambuyo pake.

Cholinga chachisoni ndi kulira sikutaya kutayika kapena wokondedwa kumbuyo, koma kubwera kumalo okhudzidwa komwe kulemera kwa ululu sikulemetsa kapena kulamulira malingaliro ake.

Nthawi zonse pamakhala zowawa zokhudzana ndi kutayika kwakukulu. Kusiyanitsa ndikuti wopulumukayo amatha kuyendetsa zowawa, kupitiliza kukhala moyo wawo, ndikupita patsogolo kukumana nazo zatsopano komanso maubale.

Nthano - Kuchira mwachisoni kuyenera kuchitika munthawi inayake.

Palibe malire pakutha kwachisoni. Zitha kutenga munthu m'modzi sabata, zitha kutenga munthu wina zaka.

Nthawi yakuchira ikudalira zinthu zambiri zosiyana zomwe sizingathe kuwerengeredwa m'njira iliyonse yoyenera. Mmodzi nthawi zonse ayenera kupewa kukakamiza nthawi yayitali pachisoni cha aliyense, kuphatikiza iwowo.

Nthano - Chisoni sichiyenera kumva. Munthu amangoyiyamwa ndikuchita nayo.

Ichi ndi nthano yowononga kwambiri yomwe ingayambitse mavuto ena monga kugwiritsa ntchito mankhwala osokoneza bongo, kuledzera, ndi kukhumudwa kwamankhwala.

Lingaliro loti aliyense ayenera kungoyamwa chisoni chawo ndikulimbana nacho ndichikhalidwe chomwe chimasokoneza thanzi lamunthu, kutha kupirira, ndikuchira kutayika kwawo.

Kuyesera kuthawa ndikubisalira chisoni nthawi zonse kumatha molakwika. Nthawi zonse imagwira, posachedwa kapena mtsogolo, nthawi zina zaka mumsewu. Aliyense ayenera kudziwa kuti nkwabwino kumva chisoni, kuti ndimachitidwe achilengedwe akamatayika.

Nthano - Pali njira yachisoni kapena njira yomwe ingathandizire kwambiri munthu kulira.

Njira yochira ndiyosiyana kwa aliyense. Palibe njira yothetsera kukula kwake. Alangizi achisoni ndi othandizira nthawi zambiri amakhala ngati malangizo othandizira opulumuka kuti adziwe momwe akumvera, kukhala ndi ziyembekezo, ndikuwongolera kupita patsogolo. Izi zitha kuwoneka zosiyana kuchokera kwa munthu ndi munthu.

zinthu zoti mungakambirane ndi anzanu pa mameseji

Gawo 5: Potseka…

Mphamvu yakutayika imamveka ndi munthu aliyense nthawi ina. Anthu adzagwidwa ndi chisoni chifukwa cha kusokonekera komanso kupita patsogolo kwa moyo.

Chisoni chitha kubwera chifukwa chotaikiridwa ndi ntchito, kumwalira kwa wokondedwa kapena chiweto chomwe amasilira, kusintha kwakukulu pakukwanitsa kuchita moyo wawo, monga matenda osachiritsika kapena ngozi, kapenanso kutha kwa ubale.

Zomwe tingachite ndikulimbana ndi chisoni chathu ndi mphamvu komanso kutsimikiza momwe tingathere. Nthawi zina, sizingakhale zomveka. Pali nthawi zina pomwe kulemerako kumakhala kolemera kwambiri kotero kuti timamva ngati kuti sitingathe kupita patsogolo.

Palibe vuto.

Simuyenera kukhala mukupitabe patsogolo mosalekeza, koma musathawe mwina. Nthawi zina munthu amangofunika kupuma pang'ono.

Kuleza mtima ndi gawo lofunikira kwambiri pakumva chisoni kapena kupezeka komanso kuchitira chifundo wokondedwa. Tiyenera kukhala oleza mtima osati kwa ife tokha, komanso kuti opulumukawo adutse nthawi yovuta kwambiri. Tonse titha kugwiritsa ntchito kuleza mtima pang'ono m'miyoyo yathu.

Pamabwera mfundo ina pamene kumakhala kwanzeru kufunafuna chithandizo cha akatswiri. Ngati kupweteka kwakutayika kumakhala kwakukulu komanso kofooketsa, mlangizi wachisoni kapena mlangizi wotsimikizika wazamisala atha kuthandiza wozunzidwayo kuyenda m'njira yoti achire.

Musazengereze kufunafuna chithandizo, kapena kulimbikitsa wokondedwa wanu kuti apeze thandizo la akatswiri, ngati wina akuvutika kuti athetse kutayika.